Thursday, January 28, 2016


Debbie just called with our transfer time for Saturday: 10 AM.

A wave of nerves just smacked against me. Good nerves, like the kind you feel before you step on stage, or the kind you get right before you hear the starting gun explode before a race.

Nerves nonetheless.

Every time the hope of pregnancy creeps up inside me, I try to squash it down so I don't set myself up for even more pain. Truth is though, that disappointment is disappointment, whether now or later.

Please God. Please let this be the time it works.

Even as I type those words, I fear, I pray, I hope.

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